Date: 2011-05-29 12:37 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

It's been so long and we still don't have anywhere close to a full bad put together. I've had to do solo stuff at clubs to be able to buy food and keep the new flat. I don't like this, not one bit. I miss having the band, being comfortable about where I am, that there'll be food on the table that night, that I can go out when I want to.This is horrid, I want things to go back to the way they are.

[Private to Miles]

Haven't been doing great. I've been so stressed out, so there've been slip ups. So many slip ups. I don't even know why I'm trying anymore.

Date: 2011-04-10 12:29 Subject: Private to Miles Security: Public

That didn't last long. I tried though. I tried so so hard.

Date: 2011-04-08 20:53 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

It's been almost a week since I last used. I haven't slept in two days, I wanna hit things all the time and I feel like my heart's gonna come out of my chest-literally. I don't know if I can do this anymore.

Date: 2011-04-01 06:02 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I need to get my life in order. Hello, brave new world.

[Miles]

I've almost died one too many times for a lifetime. But I don't know if I really can change. This...my lifestyle is all I've known, since the days of the war, really. And I don't know if my fans will still love me or even like me if I'm not out snogging blokes and doing all the usual crazy shite. I'd love your help in all this - you've been a real friend to me.

Date: 2011-02-20 08:05 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

[Private]

No. No no no no, this can't be happening. It's all falling apart. I can't deal with this right now. How could they do this to us? They knew how much the band means to us, and they go and muck it up? I can't fucking believe it.

[Stephen]
I don't know. I don't know what to say. It's taking all my will not to go get fucked up right now. I can't deal with it.

Date: 2011-02-13 20:45 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Can't wait to go on tour. New songs, new sound, we're gonna rock this shit.

Date: 2010-12-22 20:41 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Merry fucking Christmas.

Date: 2010-11-30 19:33 Subject: Private to Merlin's Pants Security: Public

Just got a letter from mum.

She doesn't want me coming home for hols. I haven't seen Steven and Kayla in three years. Not even at the funeral.

Fuck, I hate her.

Date: 2010-11-24 15:31 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

GOD, I need to get laid.

Also, still working on the new album. And Christmas is coming up. Maybe I'll try to see the fam this year.

That is all.

Date: 2010-10-11 01:12 Subject: Private to Merlin's Pants Security: Public

I thought time was supposed to make things like this better. Well, time's passed and it's not getting any better.

Date: 2010-09-30 21:57 Subject: Private to Merlin's Pants (and Lilah) Security: Public

WHAT THE FUCK?!
This isn't supposed to happen. What about us being family an' all? Sticking together, through thick and thin, that stuff.

Date: 2010-09-19 04:15 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

It's just one of those mornings when you can't remember where you are or how you got there. I can vaguely remember being shagged six ways to Sunday, so I guess I had a good time last night.

Date: 2010-09-03 21:27 Subject: Merlin's Pants Security: Public

Shit. Shit shit shit. I really fucked up this time.

Date: 2010-08-25 13:26 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I still don't know how they keep getting to me, but an fan gave this journally thing a couple of days ago. I don't know what to do with it. Should i introduce myself?

Hey. I'm Laura Madley, I'm a member of Merlin's Pants and I'm back in London, sharing a flat with my band.

Date: 2010-08-23 11:37 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

( When I'm out walking, I strut my stuff, man, I'm so strung out/ I'm high as a kite, I just might, stop to check you out )